ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
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