Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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