Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

why didn't you poke me back

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(813): View more from Florida

Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida

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(217): View more from Illinois

Why is there a cactus in the microwave?

(1-217): View more from Illinois

Don't worry about it.

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(208): View more from Idaho

aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.

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(205): View more from Alabama

Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.

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(248): View more from Michigan

Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?

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(989): View more from Michigan

Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.

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(214): View more from Texas

I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator

(214): View more from Texas

and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact

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