This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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