do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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