No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
