elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
i think i scared a bird with my dick
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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