Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
