Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Jerry, you need to find god
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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