Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
