butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Randomize
