Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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