on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Randomize
