I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize