cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
