so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
