How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
