We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Soap is not a condiment
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Randomize
