Im at strip club and am horny
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize