were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Randomize
