He asked me if I "almost moaned"
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize