I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
