Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
