Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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