it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
