Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize