How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I'm sobbing to NWA
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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