A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
