I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
