I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize