I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
