I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize