i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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