Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
