i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Randomize
