If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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