And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
