dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I touched a dick in church today
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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