I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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