she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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