If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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