so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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