Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
