I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Randomize
