I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I think a kid would responsible me up
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
