why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
