guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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