It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
