Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
