your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Randomize
