My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
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