she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
